You might have noticed the new title to my LiveJournal. Truth is, I’ve been submitting it to a few LJ link sites, and they always ask for a title. Well, “Elli’s Diary” seemed to lack a little… punch. But I didn’t pull the phrase out of my hat in a marketing fever.
Now and then, throughout the course of my site’s life, people have referred to me as a “pornstar.” I am fully aware of the content of my site and what I do for a living, but still, the label “pornstar” seems to rankle.
I don’t *feel* like a pornstar. I never set out to *be* a pornstar. I’ve stuck to my own values and preferences quite steadily over the past 7 years, actually. I don’t sleep around with other guys (other than a couple brief experiments with swinging that didn’t even make it onto my site). And I don’t appear in professional hardcore porn productions. I don’t aspire to appear in Playboy. I don’t ask popular male stars to join me on my site. Overall, my site is pretty vanilla. It’s mostly just me, being me. I love to tease and I have a streak of exhibitionism that gets to shine now and then. So it keeps me happy. In my mind, I am simply a woman who has a site. I don’t want to be a “star”. I don’t want to break into acting. I’m just exploring and having fun and sharing.
“Exhibitionist”, sure. “Amateur webgirl”, yep. “Oversexed naked woman”, you betcha. But “pornstar?”